So I updated my Monster.com account and applied for two job openings over the weekend. One was for a for-profit school in the Pittsburgh area (so, not ideal, but still – permanent!) and the other was online, part-time, for international students (again, not ideal, but still – income!) I guess a decision is being made tonight regarding whether or not I’m employed for the rest of the school year. I am still holding onto hope, but also bracing for disappointment. Even if that decision is made, I have very little idea of when I would know what that decision is. Hopefully sooner, even if it’s not the one I would rather have.
In updating my resume and looking at other opportunities, I’ve also considered diversifying as a teacher by adding Reading Specialist certification (one of the biggest problems I’ve faced in the classroom is teaching literature to students who can’t read) or by moving into a different aspect of education, namely, education policy. As a teaching intern and a substitute teacher, I’ve had the opportunity to work inside a variety of classrooms and talk with teachers and administrators as a kind of “outsider” – someone who isn’t inside the system with an agenda to pursue, at least not beyond getting a permanent job – and in many situations, I think the problems public schools in particular are facing are fundamental, institutionally-based flaws, not something a teacher can fix with dynamic lesson plans (perhaps bought and sold on the Internet) even though it may help.
I’ve often thought that my high school teaching career would probably be short (less than 10 years), but that’s obviously not something you share with prospective employers. Frankly, I’ve already seen and experienced how toxic an environment it can be for teachers who genuinely want their students to learn (see my employment situation, where my students have had six different English teachers since the last week of August thanks to nepotism and poor planning) and while there’s something to be said for teachers who stick it out, I’m not sure that’s the place for me to effect change. I’ve been interested in policy since I was an undergraduate, and the roots and foundations of institutions and how to effect change in a large way (this was less about the literature-loving part of me and more about the Women’s Studies major, sociologist part of me) seem to me like really important work I could do. So I’ve been looking into PhD programs about learning policy. I’m not sure what exactly my timeframe is, but depending on my employment situation this may be something I go for next fall. It would incorporate almost all of my interests (research, social justice and change, gender, education, and public policy) and I would have the opportunity to continue teaching on a collegiate level.
Sometimes I have this feeling that God is directing me to something else. I try really hard to let that voice in, but sometimes I want to block it out to force a fit with my own plans. But maybe I am supposed to do something else. I should pursue that voice and find my place to make a difference. Maybe the spot where I belong is a little bit different, but still in the same realm.
My goal for tomorrow is to think about this a little more (which seems like a cop-out, but believe me, I’ll be thinking about it, and analyzing it, and figuring out what I want to do). I have another goal of digging up some of my old Masters coursework that I can submit as part of my application if I decide to go for it. I have submitted my transcript for review at one school already, so we’ll see what happens from there.
Oh, world of academia…if I had known I would have been hankering to go back so soon…
